HENRY ZEBROWSKI
Bro! Bro, hey!
MARCUS PARKS
Yo!
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
Bro, there's a lot of negative energy in here, man!
MARCUS PARKS
Yeah. Bro, I gotta feeling there's like a fucking demon in here, bro!
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
Wait a second. Let me straight up ask him, let me ask him. Herb? Mr. Baumeister.
ED LARSON
Yeah?
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
Whoa!
ED LARSON
Hey, how you doing?
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
Mr. Baumeister, this is fucking crazy.
ED LARSON
Yeah.
MARCUS PARKS
He's fucking from beyond the grave, bro!
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
Whoa, dude!
ED LARSON
Yeah, man. Let me ask you something. You ever thought about killing a man?
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
Bro, not to like was like in this situation. And then I think about how like this pool, the way it's like all set out and shit. The first thing I think in my head is homosexual homicide.
ED LARSON
Yeah, man, yeah. And guess what? Best part, no lifeguard.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
Whoa! Yeah, dude. Just death guards!
MARCUS PARKS
Fuck yeah, dude.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
But are you a demon or were you one?
ED LARSON
No, no, man. I just fucking hate vagina.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
Cool as hell, man.
MARCUS PARKS
Cool as hell, bro.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
Fuck yeah, dude!
MARCUS PARKS
Welcome to the Last Podcast on the Left, ladies and gentlemen. My name is Marcus Parks. I'm here with ghost bro Henry Zebrowski.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
What's going on, bro? Best not be a poltergeist messing with my daughter, dude.
MARCUS PARKS
And Ed Larson. Hello, Ed.
ED LARSON
How you doing?
MARCUS PARKS
I'm doing good.
ED LARSON
What's going on, man?
MARCUS PARKS
Fucking hanging out.
ED LARSON
I didn't realize that this was gonna get so spooky.
MARCUS PARKS
Yeah.
ED LARSON
I just thought it was gonna be horrible and disgusting.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
I wish.
ED LARSON
I didn't really know that we were going from horrible and disgusting to straight spooks.
MARCUS PARKS
Yeah, man. This is the haunting at Fox Hollow Farm. This is gonna be I believe the first time that we've ever actually covered like a serial killer haunting, like a serial killer who is also a ghost. Possibly.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
I love it. I do love it. Not that what happened to get to it.
ED LARSON
No.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
But I love the situation that we're now in.
ED LARSON
It is a phenomenal story.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
Yeah. We actually brought this up and I want to find more evidence of this. I have scoured the internet and I have found no evidence of hauntings in Nazi Germany, like post Nazi Germany, like now, like in downtown Berlin. I've never really understood why-
MARCUS PARKS
We have talked about like Nazi ghosts and why there aren't Nazi ghosts.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
Where are the Nazi ghosts?
MARCUS PARKS
In the souls of the German people.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
Oh wow. Gotchu, Merkel! You big-titted animal!
MARCUS PARKS
They deal with it all the time, they're trying real hard.
ED LARSON
Oh man. I haven't had, I always wanted to have a Nuremburger but I hear they're delicious.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
I won't allow it. I won't allow it. So one thing I wanted to address before we get into the actual spooky part of the episode is that I asked a couple of questions last week about Herb Baumeister's lifestyle. And I actually got a very interesting answer back so I wanted to talk about it. Which was I asked the question why was it so possible for people like Jeffrey Dahmer, these kind of really awkward weirdos that were basically walking red flags, how do they get laid so much?
MARCUS PARKS
Yeah.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
Like how did they get so so much tail? How did they bring these guys back to their homes? And I got a really interesting answer about how at the time, you gotta remember half these guys that were at these gay clubs were in the closet.
MARCUS PARKS
Oh yeah.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
And so they were experiencing gay culture a lot of times for the very first time. And so more often than not, a lot of these areas, like these gay bars, gay clubs, were filled with guys just like Herb Baumeister. And one letter I got back said that her grandfather, right, literally just said straight up like... She approved that he would talk about this. But he said it was his fucking like yummy yum, that was his favorite. He loved an inexperienced dude that was literally fresh out the box from being straight.
ED LARSON
Yeah, breaking him.
MARCUS PARKS
Breaking them in. Not breaking them. Breaking them sounds horrible.
ED LARSON
I didn't say it sounded good.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
That's what Zangief does. They're not all Zangiefs. Sometimes you just get your dick sucked in the back of a Pinto.
MARCUS PARKS
Yeah.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
Which is nice if you're just used to your fucking wife doing it. You know what I mean?
ED LARSON
Yeah.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
She doesn't know what she's doing with it. And so Herb Baumeister was probably kind of like a hot commodity in this world. And also because there were so much, like they were getting attacked as a marginalized group-
MARCUS PARKS
Yeah.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
They also like the idea of creating a supportive environment.
MARCUS PARKS
Sure.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
You are new to this culture and I can't wait to show you all of these things about our culture. So that's kind of why a lot of these weirdos would get their dick sucked. Which is important to remember.
MARCUS PARKS
Yeah. And that actually does take a lot of bravery to still have that welcoming environment in a town like Indianapolis at a time when gay men are going missing constantly and you have no idea who the fuck it is but still welcoming everybody in. It's like well fuck it, we can't let a couple of bad apples spoil this good time.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
No, man, no.
ED LARSON
Slim pickins.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
There is. But also one other factor I want to add to the Herb Baumeister stories about the videotapes. Now his videotapes, we know that when he was pulled over, when they found him sleeping in the car-
MARCUS PARKS
When the Canadian came and woke him up and said (Canadian accent) move it on here.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
When the Mountie came.
MARCUS PARKS
(Canadian accent) What you wanna do is you want to go down the road and you actually wanna get a hotel.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
(Canadian accent) Ah right. What you're gonna wanna do... No, no.
MARCUS PARKS
(Canadian accent) What you're gonna wanna do is get a hotel because here under the freeway, this is a bad place for a man to sleep.
ED LARSON
Oh be careful.
MARCUS PARKS
(Canadian accent) You're not gonna get a good night's sleep.
ED LARSON
(Canadian accent) Oh be careful, the horse is gonna start pissing.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
(Canadian accent) There he goes, there he goes. Too much Aquafina. Now he had these tapes, know that he got rid of the tapes.
MARCUS PARKS
Yeah.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
He dumped them somewhere. We do believe he probably filmed a lot of his murders.
MARCUS PARKS
Yep.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
But there needs to be some research into the connections of Herb Baumeister, Dean Corll, John Wayne Gacy, and their net of child pornography and snuff film industry, if they were all a part of something. Dean Corll and John Wayne Gacy might have known each other.
MARCUS PARKS
They might have known each other.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
Or known of each other.
MARCUS PARKS
But there is no evidence in any way whatsoever that Herb Baumeister had any connection to John Wayne Gacy-
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
None.
MARCUS PARKS
Or Dean Corll-
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
None.
MARCUS PARKS
Or any sort of criminal ring.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
I'm saying let's find some if there is some.
MARCUS PARKS
If there is, I would like to know.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
Because there was a man named John Norman that connects all of these who was like what I said before, he was essentially a big producer. He was the Harvey Weinstein of child pornography.
MARCUS PARKS
Sure.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
And so he-
ED LARSON
I thought Harvey Weinstein was the Harvey Weinstein of child pornography.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
No, he liked an older lady. So there was this guy that kind of like that's what he would do was that he was creating this network of snuff films and selling them around the country through catalogs. And Dean Corll's victims actually appeared in some of these videos. So we know that like he was supplying videos. A lot of weird shit's going on.
MARCUS PARKS
Yeah.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
I just find it to be very mysterious.
ED LARSON
How do you even breach the conversation 20 years ago? Like now we know the deep dark web exists and like shit exists.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
ED LARSON
But like 20 years ago, how do you like... Yeah, so looking for a tape.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
Hey. Listen, I see here in your video store perusal, thank you, there seems to be a lot of dills here. I'm looking for a gherkin.
MARCUS PARKS
That's still one of my favorite lines from a Murderfist sketch was like yeah, you know porno is pretty expensive, what with all the kids and all.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
All right, now we're back to spooky.
MARCUS PARKS
All right, yeah.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
Because that was more questions.
ED LARSON
Throwing it out there. What ifs?
MARCUS PARKS
Yeah. Now as far as I can tell from my own meager understanding of serial killers, the majority do not commit their murders and dispose of the corpses in their own homes. Ramirez, Rader, Bundy, Ridgway, and Berkowitz, all of these guys had games that only worked in the external world. But there is a smaller subset of serial killers who make their home their own personal slaughter house, torture chamber, and graveyard. Dahmer, Gacy, Nilson, and of course Herb Baumeister all got off on doing everything from killing to disposal within the confines of their property or apartment. The apartment of course made it far more difficult but they pulled it off for a little, while longer than you think they would.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
It's weird how long you can kill and dispose of corpses within an apartment. I think it's because... I have a theory that supers don't exist.
ED LARSON
They're not even that super.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
No, no, no. They're kind of mediocre.
MARCUS PARKS
Or they're extremely lazy in the case of Dahmer where he's like Dahmer, your whole apartment smells. He's like my fish died. All right.
ED LARSON
All right. Eat it up.
MARCUS PARKS
And with Dennis Nilsen, that was just plain British politeness.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
Yes.
MARCUS PARKS
British politeness gone mad.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
Gone toxic. Yeah.
ED LARSON
I mean I live in an apartment building right now and I fucking ain't talking to any of my neighbors.
MARCUS PARKS
Yeah.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
All I know is I couldn't flush a thick shit down my apartment toilet. I don't know how we're putting gay dudes down there.
MARCUS PARKS
But as I mentioned last episode, I've always wondered whether those places ever show signs of paranormal activity, especially considering how many ghost stories revolve around murder. Most of the locations however, like Gacy's house and Dahmer's apartment complex, were demolished after their crimes were discovered.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
Yeah, we didn't even get to their haunted real estate.
ED LARSON
But wouldn't the ground be sour like in Pet Sematary?
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
Gone sour. No, I think it depends on how you dispose of your victims.
ED LARSON
Okay.
MARCUS PARKS
Well in the cases of both Dahmer and Gacy, those domiciles, they were still in working order. I mean you'd have to replace the floorboards at Gacy's house but someone could have done it.
ED LARSON
Yeah.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
Well you'd have to dig up the ground.
MARCUS PARKS
Yeah. Well-
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
You'd have to dig up underneath because that was where they all were.
ED LARSON
The blood seeped in.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
No, they were all buried under the house.
ED LARSON
Oh okay.
MARCUS PARKS
Well they did demolish the house. I don't know how deep they dug to make sure there were no body parts left in there. But yeah, someone did build a house on top of Gacy's property.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
Well if I know anything about state construction projects, I know that they are thorough, I know that they hire only the best, most expensive people. And I know that, yeah, they're always making sure it's done with all the Is crossed and all the Ts dotted.
MARCUS PARKS
That's right.
ED LARSON
Make them all Pier 1 Imports. I know they're gone but let's bring them back.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
Let's bring them back! Retrofit some of our more interesting homicide locations.
ED LARSON
It could be the ghost of a Pier 1 Import. It's like oh man, is that a wicker chair? And then it evaporates when you sit down and shit.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
What the fuck? I'm sick of all this fucking wicker ass based ghost pranks, bro!
MARCUS PARKS
I always feel bad for the people who got kicked out of Dahmer's apartment building so they could tear that thing down.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
Oh yeah, they didn't care about them.
MARCUS PARKS
Plenty of people were put out.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
Yeah.
ED LARSON
Do you think they were given money?
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
No.
MARCUS PARKS
They might have been.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
Maybe.
MARCUS PARKS
A pittance, I would say.
ED LARSON
A pittance.
MARCUS PARKS
A pittance for losing your home. Yeah.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
It's why Dahmer moved there in the first place is because it was in a disenfranchised part of Milwaukee to begin with, so everybody that was there, the state didn't care about them.
ED LARSON
Yeah.
MARCUS PARKS
Well that's what we said before is that Dahmer moved there just so he could be the only white guy in a black neighborhood because there the cops protected him.
ED LARSON
Wow.
MARCUS PARKS
Like they saw him, they saw Dahmer as the guy that needed to be protected. And so he was hiding in plain sight. But in the case of Herb Baumeister's house, someone actually took his dilapidated, piss-soaked mansion and remodeled it from the ground up, even keeping the indoor pool exactly as it was when Herb killed so many dozens of men there in the early to mid 90s. I saw footage of it.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
Dude.
MARCUS PARKS
And they have a fucking basketball hoop at the front of the pool.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
Yeah, man.
ED LARSON
They're having fun.
MARCUS PARKS
Yeah, no, they're having a ton of fun in there.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
Except that phantom basketballs keep getting dunked into it. I'm gonna go, it's bordering on you irresponsible how original the pool house is.
ED LARSON
Yeah.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
I feel like they could have redone the tile.
MARCUS PARKS
There wasn't a lot you could do with it.
ED LARSON
It's expensive!
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
Dude, fucking 25 men were asphyxiated and came to death in that pool!
ED LARSON
Yeah.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
I think that we could throw a rug. I think that we could do some cement. I think that we could... There's something in there that we could zhuzh.
ED LARSON
And with all those gay ghosts, it's gotta be easy to redecorate.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
No. Unfortunately they're moving stuff around, they're judging you.
ED LARSON
Yeah.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
You get fucking constantly harassed about your color palette.
ED LARSON
Oh my god. What if Zak Bagans had a Queer Eye?
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
That's incorrect. I mean let's get there but that's a great idea. Yeah, if those ghosts all flipped him, teaching him about the French tuck.
ED LARSON
Yeah.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
Yo, bros, listen. I know it's like totally out the norm or whatever but what do you think of my teal shirt? Yeah, I tried colors now. I listen to Allen.
MARCUS PARKS
Well them remodeling Herb's entire house from the ground up, that might be why the house itself and the surrounding property is the scene of a well documented and honestly quite compelling haunting. This haunting was extensively chronicled in the book 'Horror at Fox Hollow Farm' by Richard Estep and Robert Graves, which is our main source for today's episode.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
If I was you two, I would go look up obviously the Ghost Adventures episode with Zak Bagans, it is entertaining.
MARCUS PARKS
It is very entertaining.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
It's very entertaining.
MARCUS PARKS
My god, that show should be fucking 16 minutes.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
Bro! Dude, a lot of energy in here, bro! Wait a second, what's that? No, I farted. Nah, I farted. That's all it was. I thought, I couldn't understand. There was kind of a celestial sort of structure on the nightvision here and the temperature gauges. But it was just my fart. You're gonna have to go, Bonzo.
MARCUS PARKS
It's just I have never watched that many episodes of Ghost Adventures and the way they cut back to statements said before to repeat the exact thing that they just said... Like for example-
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
The man in the red shirt was right here.
MARCUS PARKS
And then it goes the man in the red shirt was right here.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
Right here.
MARCUS PARKS
Yeah. Now we may be talking about the most prolific American serial killer of all time. I think he may have been the most prolific American serial killer of all time.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
That's because unfortunately sometimes the audience doesn't pay attention.
ED LARSON
Yeah, you ever watch Shark Week? They do the same shit all the time. It's all Discovery Channel crap.
MARCUS PARKS
Yeah but then I get to see sharks again and that's fine.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
Yeah, sharks are cool. But I like ghosts. I like smudges. I like his glasses. I like Zak Bagan's look.
ED LARSON
Now who's having the adventures, him or the ghosts?
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
Him. It is him.
MARCUS PARKS
It is absolutely him. The ghosts do not like him there.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
But the documentary I would recommend is The Haunting of Fox Hollow Farm. It is legitimately scary. This entire haunting story is legitimately very creepy to me.
MARCUS PARKS
Yeah. Now in 2008, a normal albeit wealthy man named Robert Graves purchased Fox Hollow Farm with his wife Vicki and their two young sons. The mansion had been sitting empty for five years and it was in even worse shape than it was when Herb died. And when I say mansion, I mean mansion.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
Oh yeah, buddy.
MARCUS PARKS
This place is massive.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
It's beautiful. It actually reminds me a little bit of what Neverland looked like. Same Tudor, because it was a Tudor house.
MARCUS PARKS
Yeah.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
Like the same thing. Neverland was a Tudor mansion. Same style.
MARCUS PARKS
Yeah. But it didn't have the grandma wallpaper that Neverland had.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
Yeah. It doesn't have the style of Neverland.
ED LARSON
Or Bubbles.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
No, no Bubbles. Bubbles were in the pool.
ED LARSON
Bubbles would have stopped all this shit.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
They were in the pool, yeah.
ED LARSON
You give him a compound, this would have ended in two seconds.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
I don't know, if you teach Bubbles how great it is to cum while getting choked...
ED LARSON
He does like to eat lips.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
Yeah, he does. It's a beautiful house but this guy is very funny. Did you read the actual... I was reading through the book and Robert Graves, he's like now I have people know about me. I'm a horse man. My wife's a horse women. Most people call us horse people. And what people don't know about horse people is that it's every horse man's dream that he would look out while drinking a cup of coffee in his kitchen and look out the window and see his beloved horses. And that's what he saw when he went to Fox Hollow Farm. He was just like our horses can live everywhere out here.
MARCUS PARKS
Yeah.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
There's a horse living room right here, here's a horse dining room, here's a horse bathroom.
ED LARSON
A horse swimming pool.
MARCUS PARKS
When you see their house, it is full of horse memorabilia.
ED LARSON
Oh yeah.
MARCUS PARKS
Like horse paintings, horse statues, or not statues but horse sculptures. And they do have a beautiful little horse stable. They realized their dream.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
It's beautiful.
MARCUS PARKS
And they held onto this fucking place. I think they still live there.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
Yes, it's the same family.
MARCUS PARKS
Yeah, they've been living there for god, I mean almost 20 years now.
ED LARSON
Imagine if you loved horses so much that you lived in a place that just haunts you on a daily basis. But it's good for the horses.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
I don't know if it's good for the horses. Are the horses getting terrified out in the field, seeing phantom men blow each other?
MARCUS PARKS
Well since the previous owners accepted an offer well under the asking price of $2.8 million, the Graves family spent the extra money on remodeling the mansion completely to restore it to its former glory. That's before Herb ruined it with his hoarding and murder most fouls.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
Yeah, he did ruin the house in that way.
ED LARSON
And the raccoon piss.
MARCUS PARKS
The raccoon piss.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
The raccoons technically ruined the house.
MARCUS PARKS
Yeah.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
He more ruined the vibe.
ED LARSON
Yeah, yeah. The raccoons made it better for raccoons.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
Yeah, of course.
MARCUS PARKS
That's true.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
They made the vibe better for raccoons. Yeah, they were hanging out.
MARCUS PARKS
Perspective. It's all about perspective, yeah. Now Robert and his wife were informed of the full history of the house the first time they toured the home but they weren't told of any paranormal activity. In fact, it was probably not known that there was paranormal activity because the previous owner had never actually lived there and had only ended up owning the property in what he said was a real estate deal gone wrong.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
I just think he meant that he had to buy that house at an extreme loss and then lost money again when they negotiated for three years.
MARCUS PARKS
Yeah.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
Which is what the Graves' did very, very importantly because they were like no one's buying this house.
MARCUS PARKS
Yeah.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
And they were like they knew no one's buying this house, no one's coming for this house. So they paid basically just market value for the land.
ED LARSON
We have to live here, our last name is Graves.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
Yes!
MARCUS PARKS
I know.
ED LARSON
And it's covered in graves.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
I need to be next to some!
MARCUS PARKS
And they are the most normal fucking people you can imagine.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
Yeah, we just like our horses. And honestly I like the skeletons.
ED LARSON
Yeah. Sometimes the bread goes missing. Who cares?
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
Who cares? No breakfast.
MARCUS PARKS
Now Robert wasn't really a believer in the paranormal and his wife was in fact a full skeptic because she came from a scientific background, she was a pathologist. Neither one of them were squeamish either. So they decided that Fox Hollow Farm was just the fixer upper they wanted and the perfect home for their beloved horses.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
I just want to make sure that the horses are okay. All right? And that the horses have got a place to be.
MARCUS PARKS
in the footage I saw-
ED LARSON
They're the glue that holds the place together.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
Yeah, nice. (applause)
ED LARSON
Thank you, thank you. Eddietunes.com.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
E-D-D-I-E-T-U-N-E-S.
MARCUS PARKS
Available for bookings. Now the paranormal activity started as it usually does, in small increments. The first odd occurrence came when Vicki was vacuuming and the cord was suddenly pulled out of the socket. She plugged it back in but actually watched as it flew out again on its own as if it was tugged by someone or something.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
You're gonna stay dirty, bitch. What?
ED LARSON
Get a broom. Jesus.
MARCUS PARKS
Now even though Vicki was, as I said, a skeptic, this was too weird to ignore. And she said that she suddenly got the strong sense that she wasn't alone in the house and whatever it was that was there with her didn't want her to stay.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
All she heard was the sounds of (choking).
MARCUS PARKS
Would that be Herb?
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
Yes.
ED LARSON
Yeah. That was Herb fellating a horse.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
Neigh! He's saying no. It's rape.
MARCUS PARKS
Now a few months after the renovations were finished, Robert and Vicki invited a friend, Joe LeBlanc, to rent the apartment above the garage like so much Fonzie.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
But he wasn't, he was more a Ron Howard than a Fonzie.
MARCUS PARKS
That is true. I would say he was a bit more of a Potsie.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
Yes. Oh yes.
MARCUS PARKS
Well like Robert and Vicki, the history of the home didn't bother Joe at all.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
Oh wow! The first thing he heard, as soon as he heard about it he was like oh no shit, huh? Great! Oh wow. Fun.
ED LARSON
You're telling me I got to live above a whole garage? That's incredible!
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
I gotta share a bathroom with a horse? Unbelievable. This is incredible! I was just living in a trash can. Yeah, I'm from Sesame Street.
MARCUS PARKS
It was a massive, it was a 4000 square foot garage.
ED LARSON
That's beautiful.
MARCUS PARKS
It was huge.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
That's great.
MARCUS PARKS
But in Joe's first night in the apartment, he had a horribly vivid nightmare. In the dream, Joe said that he was running through the woods behind the house, convinced that something terrible and extremely dangerous was chasing him. When he woke up, he was...
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
(humming Friday the 13th theme)
MARCUS PARKS
I can't fucking get my rhythm going when you're fucking doing that. Stop it! Are you good? When Joe woke up he was still in flight mode, so his body involuntarily leapt out of bed and he slammed into a doorframe.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
Is he Martin Short?
ED LARSON
That's his fault.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
Yeah.
MARCUS PARKS
And after that, residents of the house claim to have started seeing literal full torso vapors, like the librarian in Ghostbusters.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
Your whole plan was get her?
MARCUS PARKS
One afternoon, Vicki saw a young man that she thought was a trespasser walking through the trees wearing a bright red T-shirt and jeans.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
(Midwest accent) Don't you take up any room for our horses! You can't come in here. That's a horse's lawn!
MARCUS PARKS
She couldn't make out the face but she kept watching as this apparition walked through the woods. Soon she realized that there was nothing but empty air from the thighs down. The man in the red shirt had no legs. But before Vicki could say anything, he disappeared.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
Bye!
ED LARSON
That's what my dad's ghost looks like.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
Yeah, now.
MARCUS PARKS
Yeah, no legs.
ED LARSON
Because he lost his legs.
MARCUS PARKS
Diabetes.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
But also what's funny is that his legs are their own ghost.
ED LARSON
Yeah, yeah, yeah. They're in a whole other town.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
That's cute.
ED LARSON
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
That's fun for them.
MARCUS PARKS
Still in Reno?
ED LARSON
Oh yeah! Oh yeah, yeah.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
He can't leave Reno.
ED LARSON
No, no, no one can leave Reno unfortunately. There's a big gate on the town.
MARCUS PARKS
Well about a month later, Joe, the guy who rented the apartment above the garage, saw the same apparition except he saw him at night. See Joe had a dog named Fred and they'd go on nightly walks together in the woods behind the house, the same woods where Herb Baumeister had burned dozens of corpses and spread their bones.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
I know I would. But like can you just imagine a regular person just doing this? Like this is not cute. Like the story is not cute. It's a literal boneyard.
MARCUS PARKS
I mean I know from our live shows, most of our listeners are just regular people.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
I know.
ED LARSON
Yeah.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
I love cemeteries, I love boneyards.
MARCUS PARKS
Yeah.
ED LARSON
Yeah. Dogs love bones too. Don't fucking take that away from them. Fred's having a great time.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
I know but it's bad for their teeth if they snap into a human bone, it would be bad and then the fragments will go down their throat. It's actually bad for them.
ED LARSON
Well unless they were cooked, they would be.
MARCUS PARKS
Yeah.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
A lot of them were burnt.
MARCUS PARKS
Yeah, that's actually very true. Yeah, they were cooked technically.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
Yeah, they were cooked. They were roasted.
ED LARSON
Aw, doggy got splinters in his belly.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
Don't let Rambo go out there.
ED LARSON
Oh he'll eat the fuck out of those bones. He's got a thick throat.
MARCUS PARKS
Yeah.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
Honestly if we wanna find more victims of Herb Baumeister, we should take Rambo out there.
ED LARSON
I mean he can't walk too good so you gotta use the wagon.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
Yeah, we'll use the wagon.
MARCUS PARKS
You know what I caught Frankie eating the other day?
ED LARSON
What?
MARCUS PARKS
A rock.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
Yeah, buddy.
ED LARSON
Frank. Dogs love rocks.
MARCUS PARKS
Yeah.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
Dogs love rocks. anything to make you question your whole life.
ED LARSON
Yeah. Here's a little tip for your dog owners, if you're walking your dog and it really wants something, that means it's gonna kill it.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
Yeah, yeah, yeah. You know what's nice about having dogs and cats and not kids is that I'm not worried about going in and seeing Wendy like with a big blueprints of her school and a bunch of scopes.
ED LARSON
Yeah.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
You know what I mean?
MARCUS PARKS
Yeah, that's nice.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
It is.
ED LARSON
And the other thing is if like the dog dies, I don't go to prison.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
Depends on what you did, what happened. It depends on how the dog dies.
MARCUS PARKS
Well that night, the night that Joe saw the apparition, he heard something moving around in the trees and Fred took off in a sprint towards the sound. That's when Joe saw the man with the transparent legs moving through the woods. Joe, who was now highly creeped out, mustered up the courage to walk into the woods to look for his dog. But when he swung his flashlight behind him towards a noise, he found himself no more than 20 paces from the man in red. That's when Joe ran and luckily Fred was right behind him.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
Bye!
MARCUS PARKS
So you think it's Alaska from Drag Race?
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
Bye!
MARCUS PARKS
That experience however didn't stop Joe from running the deer trails at night. Because as time went on, Joe seemed to have become strangely comfortable or at least familiar with the spirit world.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
Yeah, these guys don't say anything about my personal hygiene, they don't say anything about my attitude or my aggressive style of playing Risk!
ED LARSON
Or the fact that I live above a haunted garage.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
There's a lot of people that seem to be deterred by the many bones underneath my rented apartment. But to them I say fine, I am a lover of men and women. Bye!
MARCUS PARKS
To the point of Joe being comfortable with the darkness, he didn't stop running at night.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
You could just see him being like yeah, me and the ghosts, my only friends, hanging out here amongst the bushes just like the slippery snakes of the night. Oh I gotta go get the milk for the Graves'.
MARCUS PARKS
Well Joe didn't stop running at night even after he saw a tall, thin, dark figure, blacker than black, moving in an inhuman way from tree to tree. Meanwhile Joe's apartment was showing classic signs of a poltergeist infestation. During his first week, he was at the kitchen sink when he heard a knock at the door. Thinking it was Robert or Vicki, Joe called-
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
(drink sipping)
MARCUS PARKS
Could you stop fucking doing the... I'm trying to tell a story and you're sitting there slurping on a goddamn half empty ice coffee.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
(slurping) It's ice. It was ice.
ED LARSON
That's what you get.
MARCUS PARKS
Well thinking it was Robert or Vicki, Joe called out that he'd be right there.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
I'll be right there! Oh my god, a visitor! I have never had one.
MARCUS PARKS
The banging however grew louder and more persistent and Joe's dog Fred started growling. But when Joe opened the door, no one was there. But he felt as if he'd let something in. He then sat down to watch TV and saw a flash of movement behind him. But again, nothing was there.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
Honestly I'm not even scared. I'm just lonely. You could be a demon like Mr. Bagans said you might be but I'll take it, buddy. If we could just sit and maybe talk about this week's Top Chef. Just anybody, anything.
MARCUS PARKS
Now Robert Graves, the owner of the property, wanted to get on top of this situation, presumably to see if there was some maniac wandering his property, hassling his wife and his friend Joe. So he covered both the outside of the house and the apartment with cameras but no human being was ever seen. Now even though Joe knew that the woods were a place of spiritual horrors, he wasn't prepared when he ran across something very real. After a walk with Fred during the day, Joe returned to the house and announced that he'd found something in the woods.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
Hey, yeah, I think I found something pretty curious out there!
MARCUS PARKS
It was without a doubt an 18 inch long human bone. It was a femur, the largest bone in the body. There was still a femur out there.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
Yeah, dude.
ED LARSON
The cops didn't find it?
MARCUS PARKS
Nobody found it! Well I mean I'll get to it here and I'll tell you what happened.
ED LARSON
Yeah.
MARCUS PARKS
Robert Graves had been given instructions on what to do when he, he found bones in the woods. Because even though thousands have been taken from the site already, investigators knew that it would be a fool's errand to try and find all of them. It's 16 acres.
ED LARSON
Okay.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
Yeah, dude. He definitely murdered more than the 11 people that they charged him with or they thought that they found on the grounds.
MARCUS PARKS
Yeah.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
Like there's a lot of people.
MARCUS PARKS
Well sources also vary wildly as to how many different bodies have been identified.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
Yes.
MARCUS PARKS
Some say 11, some say 32, some say 25. It's fucking, it's nuts. It's all over the place. It's true crime, what do you want? What do you want? But what are you gonna expect? There's no fucking fact in this goddamn business.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
I do wish that there was closure for some of the families that had people that went missing.
MARCUS PARKS
Yeah.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
But what are you gonna do?
MARCUS PARKS
Yeah.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
It's very difficult.
ED LARSON
How about crime stories? You call it that.
MARCUS PARKS
Instead of true crime? Yeah.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
No, no, crime tales.
ED LARSON
Yeah, yeah, yeah. And then it could also be about dogs.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
Yeah.
MARCUS PARKS
Well considering how they were still finding fully intact femurs as late as 2008, it's over a decade after the cops discovered the boneyard. It's almost guaranteed that there are plenty of human remains in those woods that are yet to be discovered almost 30 years later. Guarantee you there are bones still out there. In fact, as Robert Graves put it in an interview, if you spend enough time back there, you could find bones in those woods on a near constant basis.
ED LARSON
Yeah. I mean it's thousands of bones before they're broken up.
MARCUS PARKS
Yeah.
ED LARSON
How many bones in the body?
MARCUS PARKS
300 some odd.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
(slurred) 597.
ED LARSON
You're drunk.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
No. no.
MARCUS PARKS
I think it's 342.
ED LARSON
Yeah, this is a fact that you gotta jam in your brain, Marcus.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
I think what's important about this is that-
MARCUS PARKS
206!
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
It holds up the show. I think that it's important. Yeah, but if you smash it up, yeah, it immediately becomes 1030.
MARCUS PARKS
Yeah.
ED LARSON
Yeah. Exactly.
MARCUS PARKS
I was a physical anthropology minor for like a year.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
Jesus Christ.
ED LARSON
Yeah. Well you didn't finish.
MARCUS PARKS
Well it was 20 years ago.
ED LARSON
I don't know numbers.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
And what was that one? Where like these are bones, this is a drum, this is an old egg, this is a hat.
MARCUS PARKS
It was the class I was in when 9/11 happened.
ED LARSON
Lots of bones in 9/11.
MARCUS PARKS
That's true.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
Yep.
MARCUS PARKS
Never mentioned in class. Well when it came to-
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
Just a Tuesday. It was just a beautiful Tuesday.
MARCUS PARKS
Well when it came to protocol, Robert Graves called up the Forensic Anthropology Department at the University of Indiana, the home of the bone twins.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
Yeah! My most prized students!
MARCUS PARKS
Well he brought the femur to their lab and they determined that it had been in the ground for 15 years and had been brought to the surface by either weather or wildlife.
ED LARSON
Fred!
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
I didn't dig it up at all! It wasn't me, that's for certain. Certainly not trying to make a soup for free.
MARCUS PARKS
Now at the same time that tangible horrors were being unearthed at Fox Hollow Farm, poltergeist activity was continuing to plague Joe's apartment above the garage.
ED LARSON
Love that movie.
MARCUS PARKS
Poltergeist or Joe's Apartment?
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
Joe's Apartment.
ED LARSON
Poltergeist. No, there's not a bunch of roaches talking in Poltergeist.
MARCUS PARKS
One night he was again woken up by something knocking on the outside door so intensely that the door shook with each impact and rattled the hinges. When Joe opened the door, he was shocked to see that the knocker was being held up by some force at a 90 degree angle. And Joe watched as it lifted itself up to its topmost position and slammed down one last time.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
Bye.
ED LARSON
I like a good flopping knocker.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
Yeah, yeah.
MARCUS PARKS
After closing the door and getting back to bed, Joe heard his squeaky door knob turn but it stopped the moment he got to his feet. For a moment all was still but the door then flew open and a strong gust of air blew leaves into Joe's apartment on what had previously been a perfectly still and calm night. Then out of nowhere, a man appeared in the darkness.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
Hey!
MARCUS PARKS
Goddamnit.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
Yeah.
MARCUS PARKS
Every time-
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
You coming to visit or are you here with the pizza?
MARCUS PARKS
Every time, this fucking conversation I've had with you. Man, I really want to do like a scary episode, like I really want to do like a scary one that really creeps people out.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
I didn't say that this time. No, I didn't say that this time.
MARCUS PARKS
Well out of nowhere, a man appeared in the darkness, an apparition different from the one seen in the woods. This one, as opposed to the casual nature of the man in red, had an expression of absolute terror and panic as it was running from something Joe couldn't see. The ghost then disappeared, leaving Joe in a similar state of terror. Not too long after, Joe watched some old press footage of the murders at Fox Hollow Farm with Robert Graves and Vicki. They were curious.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
Yeah, now is a good time to do it after everyone's moved in.
ED LARSON
Yeah.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
After you've purchased a property.
MARCUS PARKS
And when the pictures of the known victims were shown, Joe jumped out of his seat in a panic.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
Holy banana shits!
MARCUS PARKS
Staring back at him from the TV screen was the exact face he'd seen that night in his apartment. But for Joe, the greatest horror came in where else but the pool room.
ED LARSON
It's supposed to be for relaxation.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
I know. But they all did relax to a deadly point.
MARCUS PARKS
One evening, Joe, Robert's kids, and one of Joe's friends were having a dip in the pool. Joe-
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
You let your kids go in the pool? Like it's just so wild to me.
ED LARSON
There's chemicals in there, it's fine.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
It's not about that. It's not the achiness of gay dudes, it's death. It's the actual specter of many deaths.
MARCUS PARKS
Yeah. Many, many deaths.
ED LARSON
They should have turned it into like a greenhouse for weed or something.
MARCUS PARKS
That would have been cool.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
They should have leveled the whole thing to the ground and started over.
ED LARSON
It's a nice house.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
I know.
MARCUS PARKS
It's a really nice house.
ED LARSON
I know!
MARCUS PARKS
That's wasteful.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
I would have bought it.
MARCUS PARKS
Yeah.
ED LARSON
See?
MARCUS PARKS
Now Joe was resting on the pool's edge when he felt a set of warm fingers close around his neck from behind, snaking around his chin in the way that he described as almost sensuous.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
I really could use some physical contact. This is incredibly good for me.
MARCUS PARKS
I gotta say, Joe is a very with it, together dude.
ED LARSON
Yeah.
MARCUS PARKS
I saw an interview with him, like he's a very normal guy. He's just fucking living his life. He's a confident man.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
Yeah, I'm a normal drifter bachelor that lives in an apartment above a haunted horse farm, boy murder location.
MARCUS PARKS
It was an extraordinarily nice apartment. He was one of Robert's coworkers. The man like appeared on Ghost Adventures in like a really nice suit.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
Anybody can get a suit.
MARCUS PARKS
He's with it, man.
ED LARSON
They just sell them to anybody though.
MARCUS PARKS
That is true. Anybody can buy a suit. It's not necessarily, yeah. But still.
ED LARSON
If you're really, really fat, sometimes it's harder.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
Yeah.
MARCUS PARKS
Now Joe thought that the hands belonged to his buddy, just a little good natured horseplay. But when he looked behind him, he saw that both his friend and the Graves siblings were at least 20 ft away. Again creeped out, Joe swam to the middle of the pool where the ghostly hands again locked themselves around his neck, this time with a near deadly force. Joe felt himself being dragged beneath the water but when he tried prying the invisible hands off his throat, he found nothing to grab hold of. Suddenly the force let go, so Joe swam back to the top and screamed for everyone to get out of the pool and stay out of the pool.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
Get outta the pool!
ED LARSON
Fish out of water! Fish out of water!
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
Get out of the pool! Everybody, there were soft hands strangling me in the water. And yes, I maybe should not have worn my turtleneck into the pool.
MARCUS PARKS
Reportedly, Joe would get extremely upset just retelling the story because it was the most frightening thing that ever happened to him. End suffice to say, Joe never stepped foot in the pool room ever again. But that didn't end Joe's haunting. Not too long after, Joe was sitting at his computer in his apartment when he heard a scraping noise coming from the kitchen.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
Must be a bunch of chickens or something. I wanna see if some chickens got in.
MARCUS PARKS
We got horses, now we got chickens? What else am I gonna have to deal with in this goddamn place?
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
I am in the center of a madhouse. How am I supposed to do these horses' taxes? How in the hell am I supposed to concentrate on these horses' taxes when there's this much paranormal activity going on?
MARCUS PARKS
Well when he went to investigate, he saw that all of his knives had been removed from their block and were laid out in a row in the sink. When he turned behind him, he saw gouges cut in the wall as if someone had sliced it with a knife. This led Joe to believe that Herb had probably stabbed someone to death in the apartment. But there's no way to know for sure if that actually happened.
ED LARSON
Yeah.
MARCUS PARKS
Because all the bones, none of the bodies were recovered. All the bones were so crushed and burned, you couldn't tell, no one knows.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
Yeah, there wasn't a full on... We couldn't tell the methodology of each one of his victims.
ED LARSON
Yeah.
MARCUS PARKS
But we do know that for a little while Herb Baumeister did live in that apartment when his wife kicked him out.
ED LARSON
Okay.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
Yes.
MARCUS PARKS
When they were getting a divorce, he moved into that apartment.
ED LARSON
It would have been a good place to kill people.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
Yes, that was his bachelor pad.
MARCUS PARKS
Yes, very much so.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
And the house was big enough that he probably could have people in that apartment without her knowing that he had people in the apartment.
ED LARSON
So did Joe switch to plastic cutlery or...? Well it's to-go food.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
It's actually bad for the environment.
ED LARSON
But good for not getting stabbed by a ghost.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
Yes.
MARCUS PARKS
Now like most people, Joe had seen a couple of paranormal investigation shows, so he dug out a voice recorder and did his own impromptu EVP session. After turning off all mechanical and electrical devices, he turned on the recorder and started asking questions. After a few minutes, Fred the dog started growling as he often did when things were about to get hairy. Joe said that he felt a presence in the room. Then after he asked a few more questions, he stopped the recording and listened back. Shockingly, after he asked the question of who was with him, he heard a muffled yet clearly male voice that was not his own say (whispering) the married one.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
Whoa!
ED LARSON
Cool.
MARCUS PARKS
And since no married victims were ever identified, Joe became convinced that his apartment was haunted by none other than the ghost of Herb Baumeister.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
(Midwest accent) Hey Joe, watching you shit. It's me. It's old chokey mcgee. Mr. Herbie.
ED LARSON
Not to sound like an idiot but didn't he die in Canada?
MARCUS PARKS
Yeah.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
Yeah.
MARCUS PARKS
You're not sounding like an idiot at all. Trust me, you're asking a very rational question.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
Well think about it. If you had this many intense psychic experiences like murdering people in a home, like it's different. In every other serial killer case that we've kind of covered about serial killer locations, it's true, the majority of them, the grand majority of them have been torn down.
ED LARSON
Yeah.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
And so we don't really have a lot of records if this happens more often than not. But this is like if you were gonna create a ghost factory, Herb Baumeister was really good at that. Like that is like a thing that you would do. And that he was such a... How do you put it? Like with Gein, these types of places, that home was him in many ways.
ED LARSON
Yeah.
MARCUS PARKS
I would say more the woods.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
It's him.
MARCUS PARKS
The pool room in the woods were his areas, which are funny because pools and woods-
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
They're liminal spaces, you call that.
MARCUS PARKS
Yeah, blank areas.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
Yeah.
MARCUS PARKS
Yeah.
ED LARSON
Now it could be, hypotheticals obviously, couldn't it be a victim trying to get revenge on his murderer?
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
Sure. Absolutely. Or just trying to communicate, if you believe in the concept of intelligent hauntings, that they're trying to communicate that something bad happened to them in this apartment.
MARCUS PARKS
Yeah. And there's also the possibility that it might be none of the above.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
Yeah. Grover Cleveland.
ED LARSON
The dog Fred's a homophobe.
MARCUS PARKS
Now it could be that Herb had killed a closeted married man, remember you heard the EVP that said 'the married one'. And it also might be that the voice said 'the merry one'.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
Oh so he was a funny guy.
MARCUS PARKS
Yeah. Well the spirit might have had once had a sunny disposition.
ED LARSON
Yeah, gay is a synonym for merry.
MARCUS PARKS
Indeed.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
That is what my mom, that was the euphemism my mom used to use when I was a boy. She used to say about people that were gay that they were happy and lighthearted.
MARCUS PARKS
Oh wow. Well either way-
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
That was code. It was code for gay.
MARCUS PARKS
Yeah.
ED LARSON
Yeah. But still, I mean it seems like it's progressive in a way.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
It's fine.
ED LARSON
She could have said something way worse.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
Oh yeah. Oh yeah.
MARCUS PARKS
But either way, Joe was now absolutely convinced that he shared an apartment with a spirit. Now before long, who else should catch wind of the haunting at Fox Hollow Farm than Ghost Adventures host Zak Bagans.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
Now Zak Bagans, he loves-
MARCUS PARKS
Bay-gans, excuse me. Bay-gans.
ED LARSON
Is it Bay-gans?
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
Yeah, it is Bay-gans. He wanted... This is catnip for Zak Bagans.
MARCUS PARKS
Yeah, my god.
ED LARSON
Yeah.
MARCUS PARKS
Well after the family readily agreed to host an episode, Zak and his crew of ghost bros arrived and started yelling at the spirits and taking every single thing anyone said and extrapolating with abandon, as is their want.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
Oh my god, I got another untrackable construct here in the, it's on the light machine! Ah, I farted again.we gotta make these things less sensitive, bro.
ED LARSON
Too much sausage in Indianapolis.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
What am I gonna do, bro? Fucking living on the road, dude. All right? We been eating nothing but room service and Whataburger for the last fucking three days, bro. You want these scanners set up, Zak?
MARCUS PARKS
Well according to the family though, and this is fun, what they were most excited about was that one of their sons was able to play a dark spirit in one of the dramatized reenactments, which is a request I'd absolutely make if I was ever on one of those shows.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
Oh yeah. Oh yeah. It's like I play Herb.
MARCUS PARKS
Yeah.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
This is my house, I play Herb.
ED LARSON
I've wanted to be a reenactor so bad.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
I know. We've talked about this.
MARCUS PARKS
Oh my god. I mean the best reenactments in all of true crime, Fatal Vows. You gotta watch Fatal Vows.
ED LARSON
You told me this before.
MARCUS PARKS
It's just absolutely incredible. They've got the best reenactments out there. They're ridiculous and nobody's attractive. Now Zak Bagans suggested that Robert Graves had a deep connection to Herb Baumeister, which isn't the nicest thing to say to someone. Robert said-
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
Yeah. You and Herb, a lot alike, huh?
ED LARSON
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
MARCUS PARKS
Deep, deep, I'm feeling a deep connection between you.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
You guys are like brothers from another mother, right?
MARCUS PARKS
Well Robert said that he certainly felt a presence but while he respected Zak's opinion, they would have to agree to disagree about this certain point.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
I think it's because Robert Graves became obsessed with Herb Baumeister on his own.
MARCUS PARKS
Sure.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
And started researching the story of Herb Baumeister. And that in the book, he wrote the sections about Herb Baumeister.
MARCUS PARKS
Yeah. Now the first thing the Ghost Adventures crew recorded once their investigation began following all the interviews was a loud bang coming from the empty pool room.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
Oh shit! Check the noodles!
MARCUS PARKS
The what?
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
Check the pool noodles, bro! Check it for vibes! All right, according to the vibe detector, the noodle vibes, harsh. It's harsh in here, dog.
MARCUS PARKS
Zak claimed that at that moment he saw a white mist coming from a room adjacent to the pool. And when the audio was replayed, they heard what they called a class A EVP, a voice asking for help.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
Yeah, it went like (whispering) help, help.
MARCUS PARKS
Next, Bagans used a spirit box, you know the thing that quickly scans through radio stations to see if any messages from beyond can be discerned from the garble.
ED LARSON
Cool.
MARCUS PARKS
Yeah. When they asked the spirit its name, it only responded with (whispering) I'm dead.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
Yeah, fucking cool. All right, bro.
MARCUS PARKS
Yeah. When asked who killed them, it said (whispering) I don't know.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
Holy fucking shit. We got a confused ghost! That's my favorite shit, bro.
ED LARSON
You think you could have said I'm Ed?
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
Oh whoa. Did you do it?
ED LARSON
Yeah. No, the ghost.
MARCUS PARKS
Instead of saying 'I'm dead', I'm Ed.
ED LARSON
I'm Ed. It could have been someone he killed named Ed.
MARCUS PARKS
Interesting.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
It might have been.
MARCUS PARKS
Interesting.
ED LARSON
Or Fred the dog. It could have been the dog talking.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
Whoa, that was the dog's consciousness talking through the machine, that would be incredible. Because the next thing it would probably say is like can I have some chicken?
MARCUS PARKS
Holy shit, dude. What if this whole time spirit boxes were just picking up the brain of the fucking nearest dog?
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
Whoa! Whoa! Whoa, fuck! Dude!
MARCUS PARKS
Fuck. I just fucking turned the entire paranormal world inside out.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
Oh shit, did you know fucking dogs can think? And they're haunting our hotels.
MARCUS PARKS
But finally when asked how many men Herb had killed in the house, they heard the spirit box say:
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
Herb did it.
MARCUS PARKS
(whispering) Herb did it.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
Herb did it.
ED LARSON
And he's like I don't know, I didn't fucking kill anybody. I was killed.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
Yeah dude, quit coming at me, bro.
MARCUS PARKS
Zak then claimed to feel a heavy pressure pushing down on his chest and his heart rate increased dramatically. It was sort of like-
ED LARSON
Sausages, yeah.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
Yeah. I mean again, it's hard to be on the road.
MARCUS PARKS
Next, the team took the spirit box out to the woods where they heard a voice say:
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
(whispering) I'm here.
MARCUS PARKS
When asked where 'here' was, the voice said:
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
(whispering) In the middle.
MARCUS PARKS
And once the crew found the spot that could reasonably be considered the middle, the voice said:
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
(whispering) Found it.
MARCUS PARKS
They did not however dig for remains.
ED LARSON
Why not?
MARCUS PARKS
They didn't feel like it.
ED LARSON
They brought all this equipment and not a shovel?
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
Honestly truly probably two points here is that number one, they didn't probably bring the right equipment because the ground was cold. Even when they were filming, you could tell it was cold.
ED LARSON
Okay.
MARCUS PARKS
Yeah.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
So it would actually probably be very difficult for them to dig.
ED LARSON
Frozen earth, okay.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
And then also just probably straight up, they didn't have it in the budget in the allotted time period.
ED LARSON
They didn't have digging in the budget?
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
It costs money! It costs money! You think Zak Bagans is doing it?
ED LARSON
Certainly not.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
No!
MARCUS PARKS
No, no, no.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
You gotta hire a crew!
MARCUS PARKS
A fucking dude can handle a shovel.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
Dude, it's harder. I did an entire short comedy about this.
ED LARSON
About digging?
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
About how difficult it is to dig. It's like a whole bit. It's a whole thing about the bit.
ED LARSON
So we're supposed to believe that short comedies are truth?
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
Yes. In this context.
MARCUS PARKS
I mean yeah, post hole-
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
It's harder to dig than you think it is to dig.
MARCUS PARKS
Post hole-
ED LARSON
Look who you're talking to!
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
It's harder to dig.
MARCUS PARKS
I know a lot about digging. Shovel digging is not that bad, post hole digging, now that's some difficult digging.
ED LARSON
Yeah.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
But if you're digging for remains, it might take some time.
MARCUS PARKS
Yeah. And that would mean it's very easy digging, it's just very slow digging.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
Yeah. It's slow digging and you're listening to a radio telling you to do it. So yeah, it might be difficult.
MARCUS PARKS
Now after Zak Bagans, Robert and Vicki had a whole series of other paranormal investigators, psychics, mediums, and shamans visit their property. And they mostly confirmed that the ghost of Herb Baumeister and some of his victims were still tied to the property at Fox Hollow Farm.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
I love psychics and obviously there is a dubious nature to a lot of psychics and we all can decide how much we believe in what psychics say whenever we want. That's what I like about psychics.
MARCUS PARKS
Well I mean you could use the word psychic, you could use the word sensitive.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
Yes.
MARCUS PARKS
Sensitive.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
It's people who see spirits. I've met a lot of these people. So some of it seems pretty legit. But when I saw that documentary, it really felt like a fucking Blumhouse movie.
MARCUS PARKS
Yeah.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
Where each one of the psychics came and were like it's bad here.
MARCUS PARKS
Yeah.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
I don't like being here. You know what I mean? Because they did the thing where they do the double blind, where they don't tell you what you're gonna go do.
MARCUS PARKS
Yeah.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
So they have the psychic come out and like you don't know why you're there. But I think ostensibly you know you're not there for good reason.
MARCUS PARKS
Yeah.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
You're not there because like oh wow, they invented the airplane here! Like that's not why you do that because it's normally a sign for good things. You don't need a psychic to tell you that good things happened there.
ED LARSON
It's hard!
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
Because they advertise.
MARCUS PARKS
Yeah.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
And people sell tickets to it and they want you to come look at it.
MARCUS PARKS
Yeah.
ED LARSON
Dude, I trained to be a medium and they're like yo, you're an extra large.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
Eddie, that's classic. EddieTunes.com.
MARCUS PARKS
EddieTunes.com, available for bookings all over America.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
It's crazy how available he is.
MARCUS PARKS
He will come to you.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
He's like super available.
MARCUS PARKS
Yeah, super available. I mean he did an open mic a couple of weeks ago in Florida.
ED LARSON
Yeah. In Tallahassee. I flew to Tallahassee to work for free.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
You work for free, you hosted an open mic and booked it. So yeah, he's doing well. But to get back to the documentary, the one thing is that truly, and again people also debate orbs and what orbs are and shit.
MARCUS PARKS
Yes.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
But that fucking documentary, the orbs be crazy, dog.
MARCUS PARKS
Yeah, orbs be busting?
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
Orbs be wilding, dude. They are shooting everywhere. I think obviously it's a very, it's a troubled place.
MARCUS PARKS
Yes.
ED LARSON
I feel like any time you name a house, it's immediately haunted.
MARCUS PARKS
Yeah.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
I love that though.
MARCUS PARKS
Or any sort of like manor is gonna be haunted.
ED LARSON
Yeah. Oh for sure.
MARCUS PARKS
Yeah.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
That's my goal.
MARCUS PARKS
But only one paranormal investigator, Richard Estep, co-author of 'Horror at Fox Hollow Farm' was granted permission to do a full investigation. Now Richard first visited Fox Hollow Farm in 2016, 8 years after Robert Graves and his family moved in. Joe LeBlanc however had already moved out of the apartment above the garage six years prior but still came to participate in the investigation from time to time.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
Yeah, I finally got a chance to purchase my own home. I bought the JonBenét estate. Yeah, I love the Ramsey home. I love what they did with the basement. I sleep down there.
MARCUS PARKS
Actually the person who moved in after Joe LeBlanc left, one of the sons. So the whole family just doesn't give a shit.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
They don't care.
ED LARSON
No.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
Actively don't care.
MARCUS PARKS
Yeah, it was one of the Graves' sons. Because they talk about it in the Ghost Adventures episode, they're just so casual with it.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
Partially it's kind of funny because I feel like some people would call that sus but I find it to be the opposite.
MARCUS PARKS
The exact opposite.
ED LARSON
Yeah.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
More so when people are like now this is crazy, this is gonna blow your mind.
MARCUS PARKS
Yeah.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
Like that's when I call bullshit.
ED LARSON
They're very casual about it.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
Well it sounds like they legitimately don't care. They're horse people.
ED LARSON
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
If it's not horses-
ED LARSON
Yeah, the ghosts don't fuck with the horses.
MARCUS PARKS
Yeah.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
Yeah, yeah, yeah. He goes, he walks right past. He sees the disembodied torso with the man in the red shirt while he's combing the horse and he's just like another day at the old Fox Hollow horse farm. He doesn't care, he doesn't give a shit. He's jerking off mares.
ED LARSON
I got a good-
MARCUS PARKS
A mare is the female.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
Yeah. Jill it.
ED LARSON
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
Do they do that?
ED LARSON
If you blow on their mouth.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
Do people do that with horses, they jill it? Do you get in there with a horse?
MARCUS PARKS
Do you mean do people masturbate horses?
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
Yeah, mares.
ED LARSON
Yeah, they definitely-
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
For male horses they do.
ED LARSON
Yes.
MARCUS PARKS
Yeah.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
But for female horses, they get up in there, they fucking hit the clit?
MARCUS PARKS
Is that a serious question you're asking me?
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
Do horses have clits?
ED LARSON
They make her stand over a sprinkler.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
Yeah. Do horses have clits?
ED LARSON
I'm gonna go ahead and say sure.
MARCUS PARKS
Yeah.
ED LARSON
Yeah, why not?
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
Let's move on but I will research it.
ED LARSON
I had a serious question about ghosts that I was going to ask. All right, another one, risk sounding like an idiot. Do ghosts die? Like over time-
MARCUS PARKS
Like in The Frighteners.
ED LARSON
Yeah.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
The way I would put it is this, is that our intelligence and psychic energy is what fuels the phenomena half the time. So I imagine when you leave, the ghosts aren't just hanging out, it's not like Haunted Mansion.
ED LARSON
Yeah.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
They're not there hanging out necessarily when we are not there. We have to be there for us to see the things for it to happen.
ED LARSON
Okay.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
But then there's some people who say, like the Newkirks, they say a lot of times famous haunting sites are sort of haunted by our ideas of what a haunting is, what we're supposed to be seeing here. Many people, kind of like what happened with Borley Rectory.
MARCUS PARKS
Yeah.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
Where like everyone's expecting to see the guy walk down the path now because that's the famous story. And so eventually the thought forms form inside of this place of many people arriving expecting to see ghosts. And then therefore they're charging the haunting.
MARCUS PARKS
Yeah, we see what we expect to see.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
Yeah.
ED LARSON
Okay. So they never like go dark.
MARCUS PARKS
No.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
Or unless apparently if you tear an entire thing down, then it is much easier. If you tear the house down the ghosts will probably go away. Oh and horses do have clitorises.
MARCUS PARKS
Cool.
ED LARSON
Thank you.
MARCUS PARKS
That's great information.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
Both! Both on ghosts, intelligent hauntings, and about animal life.
ED LARSON
Yeah.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
So I actually, I'm good today.
ED LARSON
Yeah, you're doing good.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
I feel good today.
ED LARSON
You learned a lot and I learned a lot. I feel better.
MARCUS PARKS
Yeah. It's not like that stupid fucking statement you said on the Last Stream about how you get fruit juice by boiling fruit.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
I was correct in many ways.
MARCUS PARKS
No, you were talking about pasteurization.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
I was correct about how the juice was handled. And I imagine if you're doing juice in bulk, it's actually extremely difficult to do it just by squeezing.
MARCUS PARKS
I don't think they boil oranges to get orange juice.
ED LARSON
Now I don't believe anything you said.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
Hey man, just ask a horse.
ED LARSON
Yeah.
MARCUS PARKS
Now with Richard was a team of six paranormal investigators who'd all flown from Colorado to Indiana. And they decided in an obvious choice that the center of the paranormal activity was the place where Herb had probably committed most of his murders, the pool room.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
Sure.
MARCUS PARKS
Interestingly though according to Vicki, Herb's favorite room, the one where she felt the presence the most, was not the pool room but a certain bathroom upstairs. No one has any idea however why the alleged spirit of Herb Baumeister liked that bathroom in particular.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
Unless it was the only one with a full length mirror. And then he went in there to go check out his outfits.
MARCUS PARKS
Interesting. I just personally since moving into a house like here in Los Angeles, I've always shared my bathroom with my wife in New York. I've come to adore my bathroom.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
Oh no, my bathroom-
ED LARSON
Oh yeah.
MARCUS PARKS
Like my own bathroom, my bathroom that's like mine.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
Oh yeah.
ED LARSON
I love it.
MARCUS PARKS
I love my bathroom.
ED LARSON
Oh yeah.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
Yeah, my butt has carved out of space for me and me alone.
MARCUS PARKS
I love it.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
You ever read that book, it's 'A Room of One's Own'? For men, that's the bathroom.
ED LARSON
Yeah.
MARCUS PARKS
Yeah.
ED LARSON
Mine's tiki themed. I got a bunch of tiki stuff. And Julie's like I don't want that anywhere. So I'm like well I'm putting it in my bathroom and nothing you can do about it.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
Exactly.
ED LARSON
Now it's the most well decorated room in the house.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
Yeah, exactly.
MARCUS PARKS
It's themed.
ED LARSON
Yeah, it's themed.
MARCUS PARKS
I'm kind of inspired now.
ED LARSON
Oh dude, it's great.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
Yeah. Mine, Herb Baumeister. That's the thing. That's what I'm working on.
MARCUS PARKS
Now the technical side of the team's paranormal investigations is a little hard to explain or perhaps it would be more accurate to say that it's impossible to make it sound interesting to anyone but those who are already into this shit.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
I would go and read the book because the book actually has a great breakdown of how they set up a ghost hunting situation.
MARCUS PARKS
Yeah. But on the first night of the investigation, after a lot of technical tests involving lasers that showed a presence-
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
I farted. Ah god.
MARCUS PARKS
No, no, no, no. These are the college educated ones.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
The real guys, yeah.
MARCUS PARKS
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
These are the nerds.
MARCUS PARKS
Yeah.
ED LARSON
Reverb.
MARCUS PARKS
Yeah.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
Shit.
MARCUS PARKS
The group heard a door knob jiggle. One of the investigators, the more psychically sensitive one, then announced that there was indeed a presence in the room, a male energy that did not like them being there at all.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
Grover Cleveland.
MARCUS PARKS
he presence was right in the middle of the pool, very strong, very negative, and extremely threatening which suggested that they were in the presence of the spirit of Herb Baumeister. Now on the second night, Richard and his friend tried a technique called the human pendulum.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
Didn't you once do the human pendulum in college?
MARCUS PARKS
I made out with a couple of dudes. That was it. That's all I did.
ED LARSON
You did have a swing.
MARCUS PARKS
Did I?
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
Yeah, didn't you have a sex swing?
MARCUS PARKS
No.
ED LARSON
When we met?
MARCUS PARKS
Who are you thinking about?
ED LARSON
I don't know, maybe it's a secret. We're not supposed to talk about it.
MARCUS PARKS
No, it's not a secret. No, no, you're confusing me with someone else. I didn't have a sex swing.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
You didn't have a sex swing?
MARCUS PARKS
No, I never-
ED LARSON
Are you sure? I'm positive you had a sex swing.
MARCUS PARKS
No, you made that up.
ED LARSON
On Montrose?
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
Did you have a hammock that you called a sex swing?
ED LARSON
Was it in the house?
MARCUS PARKS
No.
ED LARSON
A black leather hammock?
MARCUS PARKS
No.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
Whose house-
ED LARSON
Do you remember the sex swing?
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
Yeah. Who had the sex swing?
MARCUS PARKS
That house was tiny. The bed literally took up the entire room.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
It might have been a lady that we knew.
MARCUS PARKS
Yeah, I think it was because I never had a sex swing.
ED LARSON
I always thought it was you.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
We can cross that piece of trivia off.
MARCUS PARKS
No, I had a standup comedian living in my basement. That's what I had.
ED LARSON
Yes. I know that, yeah.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
And honestly when I was watching Mike Lawrence at the time, he was more of a lie down comedian.
MARCUS PARKS
Well in the human pendulum, one person stands in an open space and is watched by observers on both sides while another investigator asks questions, emphasizing that only spirits of honest nature are permitted to answer. Once the pendulum is opened up so to speak, the questioner asks the spirit to demonstrate the 'yes' position. And the human pendulum is often surprised to find themselves suddenly tilting forward, backward, or to one side, completely against their will.
ED LARSON
Like Michael Jackson.
MARCUS PARKS
Yeah!
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
When he does the foot thing.
MARCUS PARKS
Yeah. That's not the foot thing, tt's the lean thing.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
Yeah.
MARCUS PARKS
Totally different from the foot thing.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
It's from his feet.
ED LARSON
Herb Baumeister was a smooth criminal as well.
MARCUS PARKS
Yeah, very much so. Well after the 'yes' position is established, they established 'no' as well. Then the session can officially begin. Now in this case, the strongest location to contact a spirit was determined to be in the pool. The human pendulum was Richard because this technique always seemed to work best with him. But as he stood in the shallow end of the pool, it was actually Richard's spotters who experienced the most activity. One, a guy named Sean, felt fingers caress his hand as if a spirit wanted to hold it. The other investigator however, a woman named Erin, felt herself get pushed in the back which almost knocked her down. As she interpreted this action, someone didn't like that a woman was in a man's domain.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
Oh yeah, he was not a fan of the ladies.
MARCUS PARKS
No. Now quite a bit of activity had involved Joe LeBlanc, so he was invited back to Fox Hollow Farm to assist the investigators in provoking the supposed spirit of Herb Baumeister. Because it seemed like after dealing with this thing for years, Joe had gone aggressive.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
Yeah, I'm facing down all the spirits. So yeah, I had a son and that's why I moved to Colorado and I enrolled him directly in the Columbine High School. Because everything I do has to be touched by tragedy!
MARCUS PARKS
Joe said that he believed Herb was a coward and he enjoyed provoking him. While in the pool pump room with the investigators recording, Joe called Herb a chicken shit, telling him that if he was so tough when he killed all those guys, why doesn't he try it now on the investigators?
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
On the investigators! They're the ones, they're the ghost cops!
ED LARSON
They're like what?
MARCUS PARKS
Now while Joe was shouting, the EMF meters were repeatedly spiking which told them there was some paranormal activity happening in the room. Richard felt a cold, flirtatious caress on his tricep.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
My tricep is getting flirted with! My tricep is getting flirted with!
MARCUS PARKS
While Erin was jabbed in the back yet again. By at the end of it, the investigators were emotionally and physically exhausted but Joe felt fucking great.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
Yeah!
ED LARSON
Yeah.
MARCUS PARKS
For him, this was a cathartic experience.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
Woo!
ED LARSON
Finally get to fucking yell at this piece of shit.
MARCUS PARKS
Yeah. Now once Joe left, the paranormal activity settled down for the rest of the night which confirmed Richard's theory that Joe was a sort of paranormal lightning rod as some people seem to be. Others like us, not so much.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
Yeah. Me, I'm in demand with the afterlife, buddy. Everywhere I go, ghosts asking to see old Joe. What's Joe doing, huh? What's Joe up to? That's what the ghosts say. No humans though, no alive ones. But the ghost ones, oh man, they're always being like Joe, come over. Oh Joe, you're the best guy I've ever met!
MARCUS PARKS
But on the third... Joe, if you're listening, we love you, buddy.
ED LARSON
I think Joe's great.
MARCUS PARKS
I think Joe's amazing.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
Yeah sure.
ED LARSON
I hope Fred's doing well.
MARCUS PARKS
I don't know about Fred.
ED LARSON
Probably not, I mean he's an old dog.
MARCUS PARKS
I mean that was a long time ago.
ED LARSON
Yeah.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
Yeah. He's probably now still at Fox Hollow Farms.
MARCUS PARKS
Fox Hollow Farms.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
Barking at men.
MARCUS PARKS
Ghost dog.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
Yeah.
MARCUS PARKS
Also a movie.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
Yeah.
ED LARSON
Also a movie.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
Exactly it's not a very good film. One of his least good films. Jim Jarmusch.
MARCUS PARKS
Yeah, I mean it's no Down by Law.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
It's low energy.
MARCUS PARKS
Yeah, it's very low energy. Do you like it?
ED LARSON
I never watched it. I did rewatch Coffee and Cigarettes lately and that was fine.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
Yeah, it's fine.
MARCUS PARKS
It's fine. No, Down by Law, that's the Jim Jarmusch movie to watch.
ED LARSON
I haven't seen that one yet.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
And Drugstore Cowboy.
MARCUS PARKS
You haven't?
ED LARSON
No, I haven't seen it. I know about it but I haven't seen it.
MARCUS PARKS
Come over one night, we'll watch it. It's one of my favorites.
ED LARSON
I love Roberto Benigni.
MARCUS PARKS
Yeah. Oh he's incredible in it.
ED LARSON
He's one of my favorites.
MARCUS PARKS
Tom Waits kills it, John Lurie. Okay, this is a different conversation.
ED LARSON
We'll watch it. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
This is a side conversation that we will do. Also technically Drugstore Cowboy, that was directed by Gus Van Sant, I was wrong.
ED LARSON
Yeah, that's not him. It's too fast paced.
MARCUS PARKS
Yeah. Well on the third and final night of the first investigation at Fox Hollow Farm, Richard decided to get into the pool himself to see if he could provoke the spirit of Herb Baumeister into appearing. While standing in the middle of the freezing cold water, Richard did a ghost bro come at me.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
Come at me, man, my neck is long!
MARCUS PARKS
He called Herb a sick son of a bitch and a monster and so on and so forth while holding a recorder above his head. Now he heard nothing while he was in the pool but when he relied to the recording, he heard a male voice whispering a single word.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
(whispering) Laura.
MARCUS PARKS
This, Robert later said, was one of the most disturbing moments of his career as a paranormal investigator because Laura was the name of Richard's wife.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
Whoa!
ED LARSON
Whoa! That's awesome.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
Well at least you know that the ghost is not going to cheat on your wife with you and ruin your family.
MARCUS PARKS
That's right. Now there was an 18 month gap between the first and second visit to Fox Hollow Farm but Richard still hadn't decided who or what was haunting the property. While the Graves family believed it was Herb and his victims, other paranormal investigators were convinced that the property was haunted by an inhuman entity, something infernal.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
There's a lot of people that went down to try to investigate and they thought maybe it was Herb Baumeister or some other ghost but then they found out it be demon.
ED LARSON
And it would make sense if it was a demon because the demon could have possessed Herb back in the day.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
That's the idea.
MARCUS PARKS
Yeah, that's what some of them are saying.
ED LARSON
I like this.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
It doesn't really make sense. Why do we need a third party here?
MARCUS PARKS
Yeah.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
I think Herb Baumeister did enough.
ED LARSON
Yeah.
MARCUS PARKS
Yeah. And also Herb killed like 11 dudes before he even thought about Fox Hall Farm.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
Yeah.
ED LARSON
And I say it's easier for me to believe in ghosts than demons as well.
MARCUS PARKS
Yeah, same here.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
Oh sure, sure, sure, sure, sure.
MARCUS PARKS
Oh yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Now according to a paranormal investigator named Father Stephen Weidner, whose opinion may be skewed to believe in something more demonic, this inhuman entity was drawn to the negative energy of the farm because of the murders and such.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
Yeah, it thought that was a nice piece of property just like the Graves family did.
MARCUS PARKS
Except it was for ghosts instead of horses.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
Horses.
MARCUS PARKS
Yeah. Well this spirit, Father Weidner said, was just playing Herb Baumeister. But Herb's spirit also dropped by from time to time and also the spirits of the victims drop by from time to time, which confused matters quite a bit for everyone involved.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
Yeah.
ED LARSON
I like going back to places I've been before.
MARCUS PARKS
Yeah, me too.
ED LARSON
Like if I go to Denver, I always make sure I stop in certain spots.
MARCUS PARKS
Yeah.
ED LARSON
It's always like oh, it's nice.
MARCUS PARKS
It is nice. Yeah.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
Of course.
ED LARSON
So that's what these guys are doing.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
In a way.
MARCUS PARKS
And so Richard returned for a second and final trip with a new set of investigators to discern just who or what was haunting Fox Hollow Farm. Now this time they investigated the apartment where Joe LeBlanc had lived, where quite a bit of the poltergeist activity had occurred. They also of course once again invited Joe LeBlanc.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
Well let me check my calendar and see if it's open. Yeah, I think I can pencil you in. Please just invite me more. Can't we go... What if we went to the Sizzler? Why we always got to come back to the haunted farm? We could do a lot of things, guys.
MARCUS PARKS
No, sorry, I can't make it that weekend. That's when I'm going to New York City to visit the 9/11 memorial!
ED LARSON
He loves pools.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
I love a pool! And you know what's so nice about the ground zero pools is that you can jam a lot of bodies in those.
MARCUS PARKS
Now Joe recommended that the investigators pay close attention to the walk-in closet. According to Joe, a number of people, almost exclusively women, found it intolerable to spend any amount of time inside this closet although I don't know exactly how Joe polled for that information.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
I know two people. I spoke to both and one of the ladies said something along those lines.
ED LARSON
Yeah. Get me out of this goddamn closet.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
I'm not letting you out til you see a ghost.
MARCUS PARKS
Apparently though, other mediums who visited the house reported that Fox Hollow Farm had two portals to the other side of the veil on its grounds.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
Yeah.
MARCUS PARKS
The strongest was of course the swimming pool. But the other was this particular closet which is a pretty apt metaphor.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
But it's interesting is that Zak Bagans said the same thing about that closet.
MARCUS PARKS
Yeah.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
Isn't that weird? That is one thing that is weird.
MARCUS PARKS
Yeah.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
Well I don't believe that there's a portal to the undead in that closet but weirdly Zak Bagans said the same exact words.
MARCUS PARKS
Yeah. But just as Joe and the investigators were right in the middle of a complicated technical experiment, Joe's phone rang. On the other end was who else but Herb Baumeister's only known surviving victim, Tony Harris, who had apparently connected with Joe in the intervening years. Now Tony Harris is obviously a highly traumatized individual so we absolutely want to give him the benefit of the doubt. But it must be said that Tony's story about his experiences with Herb Baumeister have let's say evolved over the years to make him a larger part of Herb's story.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
Yeah.
MARCUS PARKS
Where in the past Tony had claimed to have only gone to Herb's house on one particular night or that was the case as far as I could tell, he claims in 'Horror at Fox Hollow Farm' that he went to Herb's house for erotic asphyxiation games so many times that he lost count.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
And what I brought up when we talked about this on the phone is that basically means that if he was there many times, he was an accomplice.
MARCUS PARKS
I do not agree that he would be... That does not make him in any way whatsoever an accomplice.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
But that's why it's a lie. That's why it's a lie.
MARCUS PARKS
No.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
Because the problem is that if you spent so many times going to Herb Baumeister's pool and you lived, you were helping. As far as I'm concerned-
MARCUS PARKS
I don't think you were helping, I think you just weren't doing anything about it. He just sat on the information.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
Well guess what? That's what happens.
MARCUS PARKS
Inaction is an action in itself?
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
Yes.
MARCUS PARKS
I suppose so.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
Good people, the worst, it's like are they as bad as the bad ones if the good people do nothing?
ED LARSON
He probably just elaborated his story.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
Yes. That's what I'm saying. I just don't think it happened.
MARCUS PARKS
Yeah.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
The way he talked about it, I don't think it happened.
MARCUS PARKS
Well it also totally negates the story he told about suddenly running into Herb at a gay bar long after his initial experience, which is a story I heard repeated by the PI who worked the case, which gives that that story more credence.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
Yes.
ED LARSON
Okay.
MARCUS PARKS
But nevertheless, Tony Harris claimed that he did have some psychic abilities.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
Sure.
MARCUS PARKS
And he believed that Herb had an accomplice.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
Sure.
MARCUS PARKS
Tony found this man so abhorrent that he referred to the totally unverified accomplice as SLJ which stands for 'Sounds Like Joe'. Tony also believed that SLJ Haunted Fox Hollow Farm along with all the rest of the spirits.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
So what other names sound like Joe?
MARCUS PARKS
Mo.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
Mo?
ED LARSON
Yeah, Mo sounds like Joe.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
Mo Lester?
MARCUS PARKS
Yeah, Mo.
ED LARSON
Joseph.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
Sounds like Joe. That's Joe.
ED LARSON
Yeah.
MARCUS PARKS
Joseph is Joe.
ED LARSON
I know but (nonsensical mumbling).
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
Yeah. Wow, that's an answer.
MARCUS PARKS
Maybe Brosef.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
Bro?
ED LARSON
Beau?
MARCUS PARKS
Or Bro.
ED LARSON
Zo?
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
Zo is weird.
ED LARSON
Zo is a woman's name.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
Zo is one of the new pronouns I think. Like Zirk.
ED LARSON
Really?
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
Yeah, there's like a Zirk. (burps)
ED LARSON
Goddamn.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
There's like a Ronald, you could be Ronald.
ED LARSON
You're getting older as I look at you.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
I'm dying. I'm actively dying.
MARCUS PARKS
Now the call that Joe LeBlanc got from Tony that night was a warning. Tony had a feeling that SLJ was active at Fox Hollow Farm at that very moment and was prowling the house. And Tony was curious as to what was going on out there. However another medium brought in to investigate the haunting, a sensitive named Brian, said that he was sure that Herb didn't have an accomplice. According to Brian, a lot of the spirits were simply tired of interacting with anyone and everyone who constantly came to the farm to try and talk to them.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
Well the Graves family talked about that at the very beginning of the book, about how that was one of the true main issues of the house was how many people showed up to go wander around the house. Because it was abandoned for a bunch of years-
MARCUS PARKS
Yeah.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
And the grounds, it was owned but nobody lived there. So they were always finding people out in the field looking through shit. And so these ghosts are all like can I get some peace? Like I know I'm not at peace but I don't need to be gawked at as well.
MARCUS PARKS
Yeah.
ED LARSON
Do they do tours and shit?
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
No!
MARCUS PARKS
No, no, no, no. Brian also said that any medium who claimed to have contact with Herb was lying because the magnitude of the evil things Herb had done was keeping him in a type of purgatory where he could not be reached.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
Cool.
MARCUS PARKS
Yeah.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
It's like fucking-
MARCUS PARKS
Ghost jail!
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
Like a hell cube. That's fucking dope.
MARCUS PARKS
But Brian's most disturbing encounter came when he investigated the pool room. He claimed to have a vision of a purple and greenish energy portal under the water with human hands rising out. That's some poltergeist shit.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
Yeah.
MARCUS PARKS
Brian said he could hear their voices and the sheer amount of negative energy in that room had created this apparition that only he could see.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
Meanwhile all the kids are just playing Marco Polo in it, just like having a great time. He's doing a barbecue next to it. Meanwhile he's being like I feel the energies of 1000 corpses in this room. It's like nobody gives a shit, he's just out there flicking the horse's bean, enjoying life. Watching its hooves.
ED LARSON
He's just gonna only talk about clitorises for the next month now.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
Just in a context like this.
MARCUS PARKS
Brian was then told about Joe's frightening experience in the pool when he was dragged underwater by an unseen force. From Brian's reckoning, Joe's psychically sensitive nature got him quote unquote "snared up" in the spirit portal which acted as a sort of whirlpool. And it was the spirit vortex that dragged Joe under the water.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
Whoa, this was all like Drag Me to Hell.
MARCUS PARKS
Yeah. Furthermore, the hands that Joe felt were not those of Herb Baumeister but the grasping hands of the spirits that blindly groped from the other side of the portal.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
(metal guitar riff)
MARCUS PARKS
And were therefore not purposefully aggressive at all.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
Nah.
MARCUS PARKS
But even so, the house was still according to Brian infested with an inhuman entity who possessed a consciousness, an entity that knew exactly what it was doing. This entity, Brian said, enjoyed instilling fear in those who invaded its domain, acting as a sort of psychic parasite that feeds off chaos and negative emotion.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
You talking about Ben Shapiro?
ED LARSON
Hey!
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
I gotta go.
ED LARSON
Taking a lap! He's taking a lap!
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
HenryZebrowski.com. I'm open for booking. You gotta book me, man. I'll fucking come to your house, I'll have sex with your wife, I'll make soup. No jokes!
ED LARSON
Yeah. Soup takes a while.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
Yes.
MARCUS PARKS
Now Tony Harris had actually made many trips to Fox Hollow Farm since the night Herb almost murdered him there, many trips after Herb died. And he referred to this nonhuman entity as the frog. He says it's almost amphibian in appearance with a toad-like face. Interestingly there is a demon described in many grimoires and demonology books as having a frog's face.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
Sure.
MARCUS PARKS
It's one of the biggies. Ba'al!
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
Ba'al!
MARCUS PARKS
Ba'al!
ED LARSON
Ball?
MARCUS PARKS
And it's written... Yeah, it's Ba'al.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
Yeah, it's Ba'al.
MARCUS PARKS
But you gotta say it Ba'al!
ED LARSON
Ball! Yeah, I got it.
MARCUS PARKS
B-A-A-L. Ba'al!
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
And it has an apostrophe so you know it's evil.
MARCUS PARKS
Yeah. And it's written that he has the face of a toad, a cat, and a human but the body of a spider.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
They're just throwing shit together at that point. That's every animal.
ED LARSON
So it has three heads or one horrible head?
MARCUS PARKS
One horrible head with the three faces.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
Yeah.
ED LARSON
Okay.
MARCUS PARKS
And the body of a spider. A lot of the demons have three faces, it's a whole thing.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
It's technically symbolism for various mental and physical ailments they would put in the form of demons back in the day.
MARCUS PARKS
Yeah.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
But also frogs are just creepy-looking.
MARCUS PARKS
Yeah, it's a spider frog.
ED LARSON
Spider frog!
MARCUS PARKS
Yeah.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
Yeah.
MARCUS PARKS
Now according to Tony, the frog primarily resides in the pool.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
As it should.
MARCUS PARKS
Yeah. But it is capable of traveling through the house if it is so inclined.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
In a basket?
MARCUS PARKS
The frog, Tony said, is assisted by SLJ, Sounds Like Joe.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
Sounds Like Joe.
MARCUS PARKS
And by Tony's reckoning, SLJ-
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
Sounds Like Joe.
MARCUS PARKS
Actually killed Herb Baumeister in Ontario instead of Tony killing himself.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
Oh yes.
MARCUS PARKS
What's interesting though is that I did discover another detail about Herb's death from the testimony of the private investigator whose work led to Herb's capture. He said that Herb had built an altar of sorts at his death site with a pile of sand and some dead crows. I have no idea if that means anything but it's interesting.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
It is technically contested. We don't know whether or not this is real or not because I looked this up. Because he said he built a pile of sand like in a that altar shape, he said that there might have been dead birds.
MARCUS PARKS
That's what the PI claims.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
That's what the PI claimed. And you know private investigators, always fucking straight shooting guys.
MARCUS PARKS
Yeah.
ED LARSON
Herb, I don't see him being able to kill a bunch of crows.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
Yeah, I feel like they're harder to kill than you think.
MARCUS PARKS
Yeah.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
It's hard to kill a bird I think. You gotta get at it.
ED LARSON
Especially multiple crows.
MARCUS PARKS
Yeah.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
Yeah. And then eat a peanut butter sandwich?
ED LARSON
You'd have to like lay down, cover yourself in lunch meat, and then like sneak attack.
MARCUS PARKS
Yeah. And that's the thing, I just can't imagine Herb Baumeister spending like a morning in a national park chasing after crows so he could kill them with his bare hands.
ED LARSON
While running from the cops.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
Yes.
MARCUS PARKS
But he did have a gun.
ED LARSON
He did.
MARCUS PARKS
He had a .357 magnum. By the way he called it Dirty Harry.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
Of course. But then the birds were strangled to death. If that was real, the birds were strangled to death according to that PI.
ED LARSON
Really?
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
Because they found a bunch of strangled birds. Which I don't know what that means.
MARCUS PARKS
I don't know what that means either.
ED LARSON
That means he's really good with birds while also being really bad with them.
MARCUS PARKS
Yeah.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
Yeah, yeah, yeah. I just like to hug them! But then Zak Bagans immediately said of course, he was like is this some kind of dark ritual? Did you do a dark ritual in order for you to stay in the pool, Herb? Oh, you know you could have just stayed in the pool, bro.
ED LARSON
Yeah, why didn't he kill himself in America?
MARCUS PARKS
He was on the run and then I think he just decided to end it.
ED LARSON
Yeah.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
Along with the tapes, I actually feel like the tapes changes everything in a weird way. I feel like in many ways he was running to... He was hiding his own evidence and he went across the border because again, that's just a good way to hide. Some people were trying to say that he got shot, that someone shot him and he didn't commit suicide.
MARCUS PARKS
Yeah.
ED LARSON
That would make more sense to me because why do you care if someone finds the tapes if you're already dead?
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
I think because it depends on whether or not he purchased those tapes. One of the things they talked about with John Norman is that they had burnt a lot of the rolodex that he had because there were some politicians and celebrities that were on the receiving end of some of this child pornography that he was selling. And so there might have been like a famous person in there and there might have been like... I mean that is total David McGowan territory.
ED LARSON
Now it's straight conspiracy.
MARCUS PARKS
Yeah, now we're getting into like QAnon bullshit.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
Yeah, of course.
MARCUS PARKS
Yeah.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
But I was just saying... If I can entertain-
MARCUS PARKS
You can entertain. Now on Richard's final day at Fox Hollow Farm, he and his team decided to give the woods one more go. But before they ventured out, they had a discussion as to whether digging would be disrespectful or even sacrilegious. They decided it was:
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
Not!
MARCUS PARKS
Not!
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
Yeah! Good work, guys! Good work, team!
ED LARSON
Yeah.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
Yeah! It's not sacrilegious, yeah! Fuck yeah!
ED LARSON
They weren't buried by their families.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
No! Rip it up!
MARCUS PARKS
So armed with a shovel, they ventured out into the woods.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
(whistling)
MARCUS PARKS
See Tony had told them there was definitely bones buried in a certain spot.
ED LARSON
In the middle.
MARCUS PARKS
Well this is a different part.
ED LARSON
Okay.
MARCUS PARKS
Tony told him a different spot.
ED LARSON
Okay.
MARCUS PARKS
And they wanted to test Tony's assertion. Tony had actually made some pretty strong claims concerning his connection to the spirit of Herb Baumeister to the point where he would stop in the middle of conversations and address Herb's spirit directly. But once they got to the point where Tony said the bones were buried, the team dug for almost 30 minutes and found nothing.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
No way.
MARCUS PARKS
But they recorded audio the whole time. And when they listened back to the tape, they heard a voice say:
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
Get away from here.
MARCUS PARKS
I mean it was creepier than that.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
Get away from here, buddy.
MARCUS PARKS
(whispering) Get away from here.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
(groaning) Get away from here.
ED LARSON
Stay away!
MARCUS PARKS
And with that, the investigation at Fox Hollow Farm concluded. Now I do believe that there's definitely something spooky going down at Fox Hollow Farm but I'm not sure if it's due to an inhuman spider frog.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
Hey, jury's still out.
MARCUS PARKS
Nor do I believe it has anything to do with an act of consciousness. I have no idea what it is, just like nobody has any idea what any of this is. But it seems like it'll be a long time until Fox Hollow Farm is free from both the spiritual and physical evidence of Herb Baumeister's crimes.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
And that's why you should come down to the Graves family horse farm. Down on the Fox Hollow Farm we have some of the most scared gay horses you've ever seen. Come on down, ride them until they faint. Everybody loves a Graves family horse.
MARCUS PARKS
And that's our Herb Baumeister series.
ED LARSON
Wow, yeah!
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
It's good.
MARCUS PARKS
Thanks everybody, yeah. Thank you very much for listening.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
Very creepy. Very creepy. And I did turn into David McGowan for a second.
MARCUS PARKS
Yeah.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
But it's good to do.
MARCUS PARKS
No it's not.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
But you get in there and you get out. The key is you gotta dip a toe in it, dip a toe back out.
MARCUS PARKS
Yeah. All right.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
I'm just asking questions.
ED LARSON
You ask a lot of questions.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
As long as you say that, you know that, as long as you say I'm just asking questions, you can say any single statement. And then people know-
ED LARSON
No matter how stupid you sound.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
You're just asking questions.
MARCUS PARKS
Yeah. I think the phrase 'I'm just asking questions' will one day be seen as one of the most insidious phrases ever created.
ED LARSON
Whoa.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
Hey, what about 'you want fries with that?' Ben Shapiro, remember when I did that?
ED LARSON
I remember.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
You remember when I did that bit? HenryZebrowski.com.
MARCUS PARKS
HenryZebrowski.com.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
Yep. I actually don't have-
ED LARSON
Someone must have that.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
Oh god, let me look at that.
ED LARSON
Who cares?
MARCUS PARKS
Do be sure to go to our Patreon, patreon.com/lastpodcastontheleft if you wanna see full episodes on video.
ED LARSON
Yeah.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
Yeah!
MARCUS PARKS
You can see us do all this shit, you can see Henry acting out his bits.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
It's incorrigible.
MARCUS PARKS
Yeah.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
They tell me to stop because it's an audio medium for a lot of people and they can't understand the bits.
MARCUS PARKS
You should have seen what he was doing when he was talking about fingering horses.
ED LARSON
Yeah.
MARCUS PARKS
And you can at patreon.com/lastpodcastontheleft. Also follow us @LPontheleft on TikTok and Instagram. We had our first viral TikToker.
ED LARSON
Yeah.
MARCUS PARKS
Yeah.
ED LARSON
Is it officially viral?
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
Yeah, I guess.
MARCUS PARKS
Yeah. It had like 1.8 million views.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
And wow, the money and accolades just came pouring in.
MARCUS PARKS
They poured in.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
Wow.
MARCUS PARKS
And be sure to check out LPN TV on Twitch, that's twitch.tv/lpntv, we got a bunch of streams going there. Eddie streams The Brighter Side every week.
ED LARSON
That's right. Every other week.
MARCUS PARKS
Every other week.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
Yes. SPUN is every week.
ED LARSON
SPUN's every week and then it's either me and Amber doing Brighter Side or Tiers of a Clown.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
Yeah.
ED LARSON
So it's a lot of fun no matter what.
MARCUS PARKS
Oh yeah, every Wednesday is a nice night here at LPN TV. And you can email us at sidestorieslpotl@gmail.com if you got any questions or comments.
ED LARSON
Hell yeah.
MARCUS PARKS
And come see us live-
ED LARSON
Yeah!
MARCUS PARKS
At all of our dates this year, we're just about to announce a couple of international dates very soon so be sure-
ED LARSON
Also Side Stories, I'm sorry, I interrupted you. I'm very sorry.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
Fuck you!
ED LARSON
I got very excited about this.
MARCUS PARKS
I know, I know.
ED LARSON
Side Stories is gonna do the Netflix Is A Joke festival.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
Yeah, baby!
ED LARSON
May 9th, tickets go on sale today I believe.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
Oh yeah.
ED LARSON
So go check that out. Come see Henry and I in a graveyard.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
In a graveyard.
ED LARSON
At the Masonic Temple. I know you've performed there before but I'm very excited to be in this crazy fucking room.
MARCUS PARKS
It's a fun room.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
It's so cool.
ED LARSON
Something horrible has definitely happened in there.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
Oh yeah, dude.
ED LARSON
There's no question in my mind.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
It's pretty great. But we're gonna be after Jeff Ross's show, so we're a separate show.
ED LARSON
Yeah.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
We're gonna have a great fucking time, we can't wait.
ED LARSON
It's gonna be great, yeah.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
We cannot wait to see you guys.
ED LARSON
Yeah. And like I said multiple times today, go to eddietunes.com for all things Ed Larson and a big shoutout to Rachel Rosenthal for putting together a beautiful website.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
Oh Rachel Rosenthal who I believe is a fantastic of the show too as well.
ED LARSON
Yes. Yeah, yeah.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
Hey Rachel, hi!
MARCUS PARKS
And thanks to Nick for making us this absolutely wonderful-
ED LARSON
Beautiful!
MARCUS PARKS
Last Podcast on the Left LED sign that you can see if you go and watch our live videos at patreon.com/lastpodcastontheleft.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
Yes.
MARCUS PARKS
Thank you, Nick for this beautiful, wonderful sign that's in the background.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
Also one of the projects we've been working on in the background is now also out. It is on our Patreon, I believe it is at the $25 tier. Rob, am I correct?
ROB OKEY
Yep, $25 tier. Brand new content.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
We have brand new behind the scenes footage.
MARCUS PARKS
Yep.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
Here at LPN that we are shooting, editing, it's gonna be... It's done. It's fun, yeah.
MARCUS PARKS
Yeah, we're fully producing, this is a fully produced show-
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
Yes.
MARCUS PARKS
That we're doing on our Patreon.
ED LARSON
Our lives do not belong to us no longer.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
They belong to you!
MARCUS PARKS
When we're in this building we're at work baby.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
Yeah!
MARCUS PARKS
We're at LPN.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
Making that milk!
MARCUS PARKS
You're not coming into my home.
ED LARSON
Unless you get in the pool and get strangled.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
Then you never leave!
MARCUS PARKS
That's true, that's true.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
Well what a great time.
MARCUS PARKS
It's a great time.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
What are we doing next week? We'll find out.
MARCUS PARKS
I think we're gonna be doing a Relaxed Fit.
ED LARSON
We're gonna talk about when Herb Baumeister took over the love bug and haunted Herbie the little car.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
Whoa, cool!
MARCUS PARKS
You waited til the very end for that one.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
Yeah, wow. I'm glad, I'm glad. Hail Satan!
MARCUS PARKS
Hail Gein!
ED LARSON
Hail Joe LeBlanc.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
Yeah!
ED LARSON
And Fred the dog.
MARCUS PARKS
Yeah!
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
Yeah, Fred died, yeah, he hung himself at the grocery store. I didn't know dogs could figure out how to tie a complicated noose-like knot but I guess it must have been my voice!
MARCUS PARKS
He's a very normal man.
HENRY ZEBROWSKI
Yeah. Goodbye.
MARCUS PARKS
Goodbye.